Owe it to Myself

There’s a feeling that is hard to describe. It happens when you avoid your potential. When you know what makes you feel good and powerful and you avoid it. We could think that it is a defense mechanism for survival, but if it was we wouldn’t be making the same mistakes over and over again in a vicious cycle.

This week I took it upon myself to make a few changes. Life is good, but there’s a disturbing quote that’s been springing up in my head for a few days now :

You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.

And unfortunately, the people I hang out with do not suit my lifestyle. I’m blunt, but it’s better than being insincere. Too much drinking and outings, too much talk about doing without the doing part, too much worry and fear and the list goes on and on. It is absolute selfishness to put friends down based on their decisions. We all have area’s where we shine, but some of us decide to display it quite sparingly for who knows what reason. I want to see my friends in terms of their potential, but if I am the one acting and moving towards new stages I think it’s reasonable to find that those who stagnate should be left aside until they decide to act(if they want to).

So unto the changes. I slowly started declining invitations that led me nowhere in favor of new activities. I went to a toastmasters reunion, I saw a conference on electronic wearables, I went to the space observatory and I will go to a display of this years most beautiful pictures according to some magazine. I saw new stuff, I learned new things and started feeling excited for the first time in quite a while. Most visits were done solo, but I approached new people like it was my last day on earth and had conversations with a handful of individuals with different stories and backgrounds.

I owe it to myself.

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