I heard somewhere that optimism without taking charge or making a move on pressing issues is bad. It invites perpetual failure and is probably worse than pessimism. The latter having the edge because it tends to lower expectations while the former invites an outburst of emotions coming from the excitement of towards a situation that is absent of any skepticism.
I don’t qualify myself as an optimistic individual. I try to think in terms of relationships. For example, the relationship between positive thinking and negative thinking. Are they two sides of the same coin? Surely. What does that tell us?
Well, it does tell us that we need negativity if we are to have any positivity. So it makes no sense to deny people who have a different view. It also tells us that choosing a side is not ideal. Because living by one possibility when there are two limits us. If we form the habit of being optimistic we tend to reject people who chose to be pessimistic in a given situation. Did limits our expansion.
Think of the relationship. That’s what I repeat to myself. Why did that person see the same event under a negative veil? Did I ask them questions to clarify their position? What about me, did I chose a side? If I did, am I attached to that position? If I am attached to that position, am I exposing the desire to be right? What does it mean to me to be right? I need to be validated by other people? Or do I do it for the satisfaction of pushing my truth unto other people? Only I know.
As I see it, there’s no time for these kind of questions in the heat of the moment. That’s why I take some time off every week to reevaluate my relationship with my friends, my coworkers, my family and my environment in general. More often than not, choosing a side happens automatically, but if we can at least try to figure out everyones position we might be able to make a smarter choice.