This weekend was spectacularly busy. I’ve always been comfortable being alone when I grew up, changing schools and neighborhoods was like changing shoes for me. And so I’ve had a secret longing to belong somewhere. To remain in a place and build ties with the land and it’s people, something that only time and experience can nurture.
Today my situation is vastly different with an opportunity to party and hang out just about everyday of the week. I have noticed that this position makes it easy to lose track of your private hobbies, it feels so easy to lose track of what is important to us. I find it especially difficult because I have noticed that my childhood’s lack of social exposure makes me quickly say yes to joining groups to talk about everything and nothing. Then I noticed it.
We start accepting outings after outings, the days brightly shine for a minute and before we know it, it’s already night time and we are sleeping in a messy room with an after taste of alcohol in our mouth and an over-indulgence of shared conversations in our head. It is fine by me, but this behavior will slip us into a cycle of redundant weeks where nothing ever gets done. It invites mediocrity. Some people are okay with that, but as far as I am concerned I don’t want to fall into incompetence, over-indulgence and being influenced by people who’s desires are not my own. At least not for too long.
I try to keep it to myself, but even if I go to bed at 4AM I still put my alarm clock at 6AM and do my personal routine. Now, I am a big advocate when it comes to getting enough sleep. Ideally you decline invitations if you know they will burn you and ruin your plans for tomorrow. It’s about having that little ounce of willpower to say no. You can build that willpower with littles acts. Making your bed every morning, flossing your teeth, shining your shoes, just caring for your body and your surrounding environment is a good start. We can also look at our mental-emotional state and check for points where we have a tendency to neglect ourselves or other people by choosing the path of least resistance and seeing why we do it in the first place.
I have fate in myself, I choose myself today and it is by doing these small routines that I have what it takes in a real situation to know what is good for me and increase my chances of showing up refreshed and satisfied.